Karen’s Place

I’ve always heard the phrase that people come into your life at a certain time for a certain reason (something like that anyway). I always understood it, but never thought it really applied to me.

I’ve been extremely fortunate in my life to have the best of friend; even when my stubbornness at times refused to recognize them, even when I thought I was completely alone in the world all I had to do was look behind me and low and behold one of them had my back.

That’s what has made this past year so difficult for me. I’ve noticed my core group of friends all drifting off to different places. I have the friend I’ve considered my sister for 20 plus years that now we are lucky if we speak on the phone once a week. We have the third amigo to this trio who is slowly slipping away as well, off on her own separate interests and new friends. None of these things are bad, it’s just sad. I am very close friends with my friend/my sister’s boyfriend and her son is my Godson, so we will always have that connection. In addition, no matter what we know without having to say it if either of us needed the other we would be there without ever having to ask why.

Our third amigo is my Goddaughter’s Mom, same goes for her. I see her a little more frequently and now that Sam is in her mid-teens I talk (who am I kidding – text) to her every day. Still, there’s a little less in common as time goes by. Our conversations revolve more around the past and a little less around what is going on currently. I suppose that had I not had blinders on, I would have known this would happen one day.

I know in my heart that these two ladies will be with me the rest of my life in one capacity or another. I’ll make sure of it. I plan to participate in those kids wedding (wedding singular, I have no doubt they will marry one another!).

I’m not saying they are the only one’s who have changed here. In fact, I don’t think they’ve changed nearly as much as I have. I think they are the same people they’ve always been, but I’ve done an almost major overhaul of my life emotionally at least in the past year. That’s not to say I made a conscious decision to leave them behind, but I can’t stay home and hide every weekend like given the choice they would do. I realized I need to live my life. I’m sure this sounds very selfish and without knowing the situation, how can I blame anyone for thinking that?

I made the decision first of the year that I would do my best to never leave a room or someone’s company without a smile on my face. If I couldn’t do that, I wouldn’t put myself in that situation or person’s company again. You’d be amazed how much less stress and how much happier I’ve been. Of course, this isn’t practical for everyone I’m sure, but it is for me and I plan to continue this path…So here we are.

Last fall I was drug kicking and screaming to my high school reunion. There was only one good thing to come out of it. I found my old friend from Junior High. She’s the platinum blond in the pictures from the earlier post.

Back in the day, Junior High started in 7^th grade. I started that year with no friends in any of my classes. Talk about scared to death! I couldn’t even have a friend for a locker partner since we had to choose from our 4^th hour class. By the time I walked into band class I was depressed and defeated. That’s where I met this tiny little trouble maker with a big mouth. She played the flute just like me. She and her friend Melissa were the first to speak to me and from there it was history. I’ll never forget her for that and I’ll never be able to thank her for that either.

Over the years, Kim moved around quite a bit, but wherever she was, she always wrote and let me know where she was. In fact, for a year or so, she was at the lake and I got to spend a summer with her. She was the one who introduced me to my first boyfriend while we were at the skating rink.

After high school, Kim got married, and very soon after that, she had her daughter then her son. Then we lost contact. I always missed her but had no idea where she was.

I think it was fate that we were supposed to live our lives the way we did until now. She went on to become a nurse and a republican (ugh!). If I’d had any influence on her, she may not have become a republican. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. If we’d stayed friends through those years, I may not have two wonderful Godchildren.

It seems Kim and I are at a time in our lives when we need each other again. At least in my opinion. Her children are grown, well almost. They are 20 and 15. She’s still married, to the most awesome man by the way. If I may be as arrogant to speak for her, Kim seems to be in a place in her life where she is ready to begin to step a little out of that ‘housewife’ role every now and again and remind her of who she is. Exactly where I was/am. She’s at the point in her life where she’s ready for her own interests outside the home.

Whatever the reasons are, all I can say is I’m glad fate brought my friend back to me. We may not be 12 years old anymore (thank God), but we sure haven’t forgotten how to have fun, and you know what? She was the first person to talk to me at that reunion…Thanks Kim.

The first thing I would like to do, is wish one of the most wonderful people in the entire world the most happiest of birthday’s tomorrow.  I feel so lucky to have her as not just my Aunt but as my friend.  She was only 9 years old when I was born, which had to be extremely weird for her - and I’m the youngest in my family.  How many kids are Aunt’s before they even start school?  My Aunt is one of the best people I know.  She not only works most of the time 6 day weeks, but in the summer this is in a freakin’ hot unairconditioned factory, when she comes home where she and her family live on a farm the work doesn’t stop.  If it’s harvest time…look out!  There’s no rest!  Oh, did I mention that happens AFTER she stops by my (often grumpy) Grandpa’s house EVERY single day to check on him and most likely go to the store for him.  EVERY single day.  My Grandpa doesn’t believe in making a shopping list.  He doesn’t look beyond the current day, so when she gets to his house to check on him each afternoon, he has something new for her to go fetch.  I honestly don’t know how she doesn’t collapse at the end of the day.  However, what does she do?  She has a virtual smile for me at all times.  She has kind words for me when I’ve had a bad day, and she has raised the best two kids I know.  Not to mention the smartest.  So after all that?  Happy Birthday!  I LOVE YOU!

I woke up this morning at 7:30 to the sound of my phone ringing.  Normally that would annoy me but not today.  Today it was Lowe’s telling me my new dishwasher would be delivered between 7:30 & 8:30.  Sweet!  The motor on my dishwasher burned out three years ago and I’ve been doing them by hand ever since.  Don’t get me wrong it really isn’t that big of a deal since it’s just me.  However, admittedly so-I’m a little lazy when it comes to house work and dishes are not really first on the priority list.  Last week I finally got fed up and decided enough was enough and I had done my final dish.  I’d tossed the idea around for a while but my built in is this tiny little apartment size and if I were to get a new one, I should really get a full size.  I called a friend to see if he could work on my cabinets to make a full size fit but sadly no. No such luck.  He suggested I get a portable.  So I did.  Wouldn’t you know, they don’t supply those in the stores.  I had to order it off the internet (what ever did we do before the internet?).  Lowe’s told me it would be here on the 15th.  Okay…  Then I got a call yesterday that it was in and they would deliver it today.  Dang, that was only a two day turn around.  Thanks Lowe’s! 

So, the delivery guys came today with my dishwasher.  They brought it in on the two wheeler.  Why it took two guys to use the two wheeler I have no idea.  I showed them where to put it in the kitchen so they did.  Then asked me to sign and left.  When I went into the kitchen I noticed they hadn’t even bothered to unpack it.  What the Heck?  Is it just me, or should they have taken it out of the box?  Whenever I’ve had furniture delivered they always take the wrapping off.  If they weren’t going to take it out of the box, why did the second guy even come in my house?  Yeah, thanks lowe’s!  ugh!   Good thing they were offering free delivery and I didn’t have to pay for that.  Anyway, I have this huge box sitting in my kitchen now.  If anyone’s kids want it to play with let me know.  Otherwise I have to figure out how to get it out to the trash guy, or how to get it to the recycling center. 

Yeah! I have a dishwasher!!    Oh the simplest things can make a girl so happy!!

I’ve been asked by someone at work to do portraits of her and her kids before her daughter goes off to college. Using my Goddaughter as a guinea pig I set out today to get some practice.

When I asked for her help it was fairly cool and even somewhat rainy out. Not so much today! It was sunny, hot and extremely humid. I think it may have come close or even surpassed 90 degrees. She was a trouper though. I think they turned out pretty good for the most part. Her Mom and I compromised on which ones should be posted-take a look.

Oh yeah, the blue tongue?  Blame it on ‘Ocean Water’ from Sonic.

Not long after high school one of my friends and one of my brother’s friends began dating. This was fun for us because it began a merger of sorts of our friends. For a good year or so we all hung out every weekend. Pretty soon the two friends got married and had their first child. I was involved with this child from the get go, I was even in the delivery room when he was born. I loved him so much. I was fortunate enough that his parent’s had complete trust in me and from the time he was an infant I would watch him or take him places with me, sometimes to give the new parents a break, sometimes just because I wanted to. He and I were buddies even as an infant and toddler.

When he was about five years old his parents began having severe problems in their marriage and began arguing constantly. These two didn’t care who they were around or where they were. Honestly, it was mostly the wife. She was a red head personified; she had a temper no one wanted to mess with. The poor husband couldn’t win most times. I began taking the child more and more we would go to the park, the zoo, and the circus-heck just to the mall. Anywhere so that he didn’t have to be in the house to hear the arguing. I know that was not my place, but it broke my heart to see this little boy have to live in such an environment. Not long after, the parents split up and (luckily) the child and his new little brother lived primarily with their Dad. Sadly I lost touch with them and until last night I never saw the children again.

Last night my brother’s friend got remarried. I’m very proud of him. He began dating this nice lady maybe around 10 years ago (that would be probably about 2 years after his divorce), she herself had a daughter from a terrible divorce. My brother was talking to his friend’s Dad and asked why they had waited so long to get married. The Dad said about a year ago the boy’s Dad had come to him and said “well, the boys are pretty much grown now (15 and 17), I think I’ll go ahead and get married”. Wow, I have to respect that. I really do. In the process of his conversation with my brother, he asked the friend’s dad if he’d seen the crazy ex-wife lately and the chatted about that for awhile. Then (from what my brother tells me) the dad recognized me. He came over to me and took my arm…

The friend’s family is full Mexican and dad does not speak English well.

He looked me square in the eye and said, “you used to take care of the boy?” I told him yes I did. He just simply said “you do good thing”. I couldn’t believe it. I knew what he meant, but I’d felt so guilty all these years for how crazy the ex-wife had turned out so I felt like I had to make sure he knew that I had NOTHING to do with her anymore. So I told him. He just took my arm again and said it again “you do good thing, I used to tell my wife every time you came to pick him up. You were doing good.” Then he hugged me.

You never know the impact or footprint you are leaving on people when you are doing it. This was such a small thing; in fact my brother even teased me for getting choked up over it. But for him to make a point to tell me, it meant so much.

My niece had her first communion yesterday.  I had to post a couple photos real quick now that I’ve had a chance to go through them.  I hope her Mom and Dad don’t mind.  I love them.  I think they are great!

In a Catholic mass we have actual wine, not fake wine a.k.a. grape juice :).  This first picture was right after she tasted the wine.

This next one I think is just a beautiful picture of her…

I was so proud of her.  It seemed like an exceptionally long mass, and an even longer day and she was so good.  I’ll write more about it later. 

My Goddaughter went home tonight…my house seems so empty without her.  Anyone have a 13 year old for rent?

My Goddaughter is staying with me for a few days.  Aside from the cruise I took her on a couple of years ago, this is the first time in 13 years she’s stayed the night with me.  It’s kind of strange having a teenager in my house.  I couldn’t ask for a better kid though.

Last week she had a spill during basketball practice and broke her arm. It’s now casted all the way up past her elbow and driving her insane!  In fact, if anyone has any ideas on how to get a pen cap out from inside a hard plaster cast, I’m open to suggestions.  I would appear it was lost in the attempt to scratch.  The pen cap is stuck somewhere near the elbow.  We’ve tried spoons and tongs so far.  She has an appointment tomorrow with the orthopod so we’re hoping because her arm is so loose now, he will recast it.  I told her when he takes that cast off it will be like emptying a little boys pockets.  They’ll be pulling out pen caps, spoons, worms, jax, you name it! 

Ahh.  I love her.

One of my oldest friends, in life not chronologically just turned 39.  Seriously she’s 39 years old, not that 39 and holding everyone says they are when they don’t want to admit they’re really 47.  It’s hard to believe my friends are officially in their late 30’s.  That would mean I’m right behind them.  When my parents were 40 years old they were SO old.  I don’t feel nearly as old as they were that’s for sure, I bet my nieces and nephew think I am though…

Anyway, so my friend T turned 39 a couple of weeks ago, she lives about an hour out of town and is coming up Saturday to stay the night and go out to celebrate.  We are trying something new.  Normally we do the normal club thing.  Dancing, drinking (with a designated driver of course) so on and so forth.  This time we are going to try a place called Tasso’s.  It’s a Greek restaurant that promises great food and entertainment.  Live music, belly dancing and even an opportunity to break some plates for good luck.  We’re even supposed to try a drink called Ouzo.  If anyone knows what that consists of or anything about it, please let me know.  The way I figure is it rhymes with boozo, so it can’t be all that bad. Ha!

So, my posse and I are headed out Saturday night.  If anyone has any recommendations for dinner at this fabulous Greek restaurant, I’m open to that as well.  The most I know about Grecian food is a Gyro sandwich at the Mall food court.  Yes, you bet-I do have a well traveled palate. 

A few years ago my niece received a doll as a gift.  This was yet one more baby doll to add to her collection.  Something was special about this one though and she was in love!  She promptly named the baby Sally and they were inseparable.                             

My niece turned 8 in November and several weeks prior I began asking her what she wanted as a gift.  She repeatedly told me she wanted a ‘twin for Sally’.  A twin for Sally?  Oh boy.  I’ll admit, I’m a bad Aunt, I couldn’t say I’d paid enough attention to Sally to be able to purchase her a twin.  Uh Oh.  So I let it the idea go for a little while until I couldn’t think of anything else to get her and I was wondering aimlessly though the isles at Wal-Mart I called my brother.  He said she wanted this new Electronic Monopoly game.  I tried to put up an argument explaining that she wanted a twin for Sally, but he told me ‘A’ would be outgrowing dolls soon and besides they already had enough paraphernalia around the house.  He assured me she would love the Monopoly game.

We met on her birthday and she opened the her present and being the beautiful girl that she is, she did love her Monopoly game.  Hugs and kisses were given, smiles were shown.  All was good. 

‘A’ is either fortunate or unfortunate enough to have Christmas come only a month after her birthday.  So, a couple of weeks later I quizzed her again.  What do you want for Christmas?  I didn’t even have the question out of my mouth when she said, “A twin for Sally”…Here we go again!  Next time I saw my brother, he got the punch on the arm and the stern look that meant to be interpreted as ‘what kind of Dad are you anyway, depriving you daughter of the one thing she really wants?” He told me he and his wife had already looked everywhere and they couldn’t find that doll.  It was a lost cause.  A few days go by and I have the opportunity to visit A’s classroom.  Displayed proudly on the wall were all the kid’s letters to Santa.  The only thing she asked for was…you guessed it.  A twin.  Not a video game, not a bike, not anything outrageously expensive, just a twin for her little ol’ doll.  Well, now I had to find that silly thing.  It was too late to ebay it, so I wasn’t sure what I was going to do.  I made my brother take a picture of the doll so that if I had to, I would comb every store in the city to find it.

Thanks to my sister and Google, I wouldn’t need to do any of that.  My sister is an avid scrapper (that’s what the scrapbookers call themselves), she has pictures of A from every birthday and Christmas since she was born I think, and they are organized meticulously.  She was able with in a couple of minutes to put her hand on a picture of her unwrapping Sally all those years ago and she was able to see who the manufacturer was.  I Googled the manufacturer and within 10 minutes I knew that my local Target store had Sally’s twin. (Thanks sis!)

I grabbed a friend of mine and two days before Christmas we made the journey to Target.  Ugh!  We found the twin though.  However, Sally’s twin could talk, eat, sleep, and came with a bed, high chair and stroller!  Holy Cow!  I mentioned to my friend that Sally didn’t do any of these things.  She said, well you know…one twin is always smarter than the other. 

Christmas Eve came and my sister was the only one in the family who knew ‘A’ was getting what she’d been asking for.  I told my brother I couldn’t find the doll.  I guess you could say my niece was a little excited when she opened the present-

As an Aunt, many times I get the gifts completely wrong.  They end up in the land of lost toys.  It’s nice when you get it right once in a while.  Even if, like in this case, they have to completely spell it out for you.